Book Review: 'Eleanor & Park' by Rainbow Rowell

I finished this novel in a sort of marathon read after my music exam on Monday when I came out and all I wanted to do was snuggle down with a cup of tea and a good book. I had treated myself to a copy from Waterstones a few months ago but hadn't got round to reading it.

'Eleanor &  Park' is one of those super popular books that every girl who reads has read at some point in the last year or so, or probably will read over the next few months. It doesn't claim not to be a love story, because that's exactly what it is. But, as a hopeless romantic, I just loved it.

Honestly, I like most books I read. I very rarely finish a book which I didn't enjoy even a little bit. And I'm always willing to try reading anything. After, 'To Kill a Mocking Bird', I wanted to read something quite light and girly. I wouldn't say that 'Eleanor & Park' was light on the sense that it dealt with some pretty deep and moving issues, however it was what I would consider a lighter read in terms of difficulty.

Brief Summary: Eleanor has recently moved back in wit her mum, horrid stepdad and younger siblings. Her step dad domestically abuses her mum and has the whole family controlled and living in fear in a tiny house and without enough money to properly live. Park is from a fairly well-off family. Due to being smart, a comic-book geek and half Korean he is a bit of an outsider at school, but sill has friends and a pretty good life. His dad thinks he needs to man-up so they don't get on that well. When Eleanor and Park find themselves sat together on the school bus, a relationship of passion, necessity and affection begins.

The first 2/3 of the book are quite realistic and, for that reason, hard hitting. The conditions of Eleanor's ;life and the pressures of Park's are something I will never understand fully, but feel as though Rainbow Rowell captured them exceptionally well. The escalating romance is believable because its not nothing and then all at once, but more of a gradual bit-by-bit development. Instantly, as a reader, you want them to get together, they both deserve each other so much.

The last third is a little unrealistic. Without giving away too much, Park begins to make sacrifices and decisions for Eleanor which in real life just wouldn't happen- because his parents would step in and sort it out instead of allowing it!! However, if you can get over that, which I did, it is still very well written. Rowell makes you want a happy ending so badly, but doesn't exactly give it you. But the ending leaves you hopeful, that's all I'll say!

The way in which Rowell captured both characters' vulnerability (as well as the personalities of other secondary characters!) is incredible and truly makes 'Eleanor & Park' a great and unique read which I didn't want to end! I will definitely read more of he work in the future! If you haven't read it, go and do so. I promise it won't disappoint!

Going Solo

If I'm being totally honest, I'm not really sure where this post is going to go, but it's based upon an idea I've wanted to turn into a blog post for a wee while, so I'm just going to keep typing and see what happens....

On Monday, I had a violin exam. It was (only) Grade 6. I put only in brackets not because grade 6 is an achievement that should necessarily be looked down upon or thought of as an 'only' kind of grade, but because really for the time I've been playing I should be further ahead than Grade 6. But I'm not, so I might as well not worry about that too much.

I'm just going to make this very plain: I really do not enjoy music exams. In fact, I don't enjoy anything which requires me to play my violin solo.

Basically, I'm not confident in my playing and that is for one main reason: I don't practice enough. But also, violin does not come naturally to me and isn't something I can just do with ease- it takes a hell of a lot of work which I do try and carry out but yeah, my practice throughout the year hasn't been sufficient.

The other reason I hate exams, and auditions, is because I get overwhelmingly nervous. Even when I try and be confident and calm, the nerves usually take over. When I'm that nervous, I falter and stumble and, in most cases, my head goes blank and I can't remember the almost 50 scales and arpeggios I was supposed to remember....

I think I'm actually going to keep this post reasonably brief because Monday's experience is still fairly raw and it suffices to state that IT DID NOT GO WELL. If I pass, I may die from shock.

But the main point in this post was to determine why going solo is so hard for me. I guess I love to play in orchestras because I can hide behind everyone else. If I can't play a part, I just mime and hardly anyone notices. I try and learn it but I'm not as good as everyone else so I just do my best to keep up! But I enjoy the feeling of being in bands and orchestras, I'm even going on tour this week in Germany with my orchestra!!! Bu as soon  as the conductor threatens to make us play a passage solo, my heart is in my throat and I panic. I just panic.

My music teacher has been great, trying every possible method to help me control my nerves, but to be honest I think it's something to tackle on my own. After an exam and an audition a few years back, both of which had me leave in floods of tears but still pass, it would have been so easy to give up and never do an exam again because what's the point, if it makes me that stressed and worked up?!

But I'm not a quitter and I had really wanted to leave school with a music grade which reflected as close as possible my ability and potential. That's now looking unlikely, which is what has got me down, but I've just got to pout it behind me now.

If anyone reading this is a performer of any sort and has any advice for me or wants to share their stories with me I'd love to hear in the comments. Perhaps from now on I will stick to my groups and bands and orchestras but I don't want these experiences to ever hold me back in life, I want to have to self-confidence to, if necessary, go solo.

Catriona xx

Book Review: 'To Kill a Mocking Bird' by Harper Lee

First of all, I just want to apologise for my lengthy absence from blog-world! First it was the stress of getting my exams finished, then starting a new job, and then practicing for my music exam and orchestra tour! So yeah, I've pretty much been non-stop busy! But, as I'm away on tour tomorrow, I'm hoping to get a few posts scheduled this morning to go up over the next few days, to catch you up on everything!

So I've always known that this novel is a classic, but since I've never studied it in school I've never been made to read to read it. In February, our school theatre club ran a trip to see a theatre adaptation of 'To Kill a Mocking Bird'. I had wanted to read the book in advance of attending, but was reading something else and didn't have the time. The play was fantastic.

My younger sister did study it at school, so when she was done with it she lent me her copy. It took me a wee while to get into, because the beginning was kind of setting the scene with background stuff. I think it helped that I'd seen the play and knew that there was a far more exciting plot to come.

Harper Lee's style of writing is one I really admire, but can also follow. I immediately grew attached to the character's and particularly the narrating character, Scout.

Lee addresses various political and social issues in 'To Kill a Mocking Bird', which I believe is the reason for its immense popularity for the last 50 years since it's publication. There are the obvious ones of racism and the law, of social austerity and poverty and tight-knit gossipy communities. But there are also issues surrounding family and parenting and education and gender stereotyping and sexism and social exclusion and mental health and so much more, if you're willing to dig deep enough. Yet in no way does it feel like Lee is trying to put across a lecture, the story itself is captivating and engaging.

What I like about Lee's style is that she cleverly gets across her messages subtly, without being too forceful or overly descriptive. This is my preferred method of writing too- seemingly simple writing which you have to work to get the true message behind, or which you can choose to enjoy on a number of different levels. NOT that I can or probably will ever be able to write like Harper Lee!

Overall a great story about justice and lack of, growing up and forming your own views and personality. 100% a classic worth reading. Apparently, Harper Lee has her second novel coming out in July (50 years later!!) so maybe I will read and review that too! Also, if you get the opportunity to see the stage version, take it. It's wonderful.