The difference between school and university exams

Although it hasn't made me stress any less, I think that the whole concept of University exams is really different- they just don't seem quite as significant, but stress you out at the same time!

I think there are many reasons for this:

1) You have a lot less revision time! Instead of like 6 weeks study leave, you get one revision week and then straight in!

2) You have fewer of them. In first year most people have 3, one for each module, but I had 2 this semester because one of my subjects is based only on coursework.

3) You have a lot more coursework to do! And a lot less time to do it in! Instead of working on maybe one or two essays for a whole school year, you have 6 or 7 to complete in a semester! That's approximately one a fortnight! This means time for revision throughout the semester is limited, but also means a lot of the pressure is taken off exams.

4) The 1st year pass mark is just 7 out of 20! That's 35%, which is a lot lower than school exams.

5) You're not spending every day surrounded by people taking the same exams and making you feel good/bad about your level of revision. My flatmates on the whole do totally different subjects.

6) Instead of January prelims and then May exams, you have two sets of "real" exams.

7) In my case you have just started the subject, or haven't studied it in a long time! This won't be the case for everyone, but when it does you do feel like you have a bit of catch up to do!


Although all of these make uni exams different, I think the main thing I've realised while I've been revising is that, at school, when I was revising for the end of year exams (which to be honest doesn't feel that long ago!) , I knew that everything I'd been learning and working on for the whole year basically led up to how well I performed in the exam hall, and that I basically needed to squeeze in every bit of info I could possibly remember. Then it would all be over. Whereas at uni, I feel like, yes the exams are important, but you're actually revising content with the view that you'll need to know the stuff as you continue through your course, provided you don't drop the subject. For International Relations, for example, there was so much content that I just couldn't remember it all, but I will be going back to look at it in the weeks to come as it will set me up for understanding what is to come next semester.

So, all in all, uni exams are quite different to school exams, but not in either a bad or good way! And in the end its still an exam, you still have a cover sheet to fill out in every booklet, an exam timetable, and a requirement to raise your hand and have the invigilator give you more paper if you're like me and have massive writing! And you still can only use clear water bottles and pencil cases and sit at your own individual desk with a wee number in the corner. It's familiar, but different.

For me, I'm just really happy that I'm now freeeeeee to go home tomorrow and enjoy 6 weeks holiday, chilling, working and spending time with my family and friends. Now I'm done with uni for a bit I hope to be on my blog more. I hope anyone who was a bit worried about what exams at unit might be like is reassured that yes they will feel different, but are still nothing to get really worried over!

How important is a title?

So this is one of those many times when I have a wee idea and then start typing without much clue where I intend on going, so bear with me!

I suppose this is my own thought shower version of ‘What’s in a name?’ or ‘Don’t judge a book by its cover’. The idea sparked when I re-watched on of my absolute favourite films: ‘Stuck in Love’ starring Lily Collins and Nat Wolfe. I first watched this film maybe a year or two ago, and had sort of completely forgotten about it, until I saw it online recently, remembered how much I’d enjoyed it, and decided to re-watch.

I could have done a review I suppose but something changed my mind. The next day, a friend asked me for some film recommendations and I found myself suggesting this film, and then defending it by saying something along the lines of “I know the title makes it sound lame but I promise it’s really good and emotional and thought provoking.”

Now, I’m not slagging typically considered ‘lame’, girly movies- I was having a bad day earlier this week and ended up watching the Bratz movie for goodness sake!! But for someone reason I really wanted my friend to know that the film I was recommending to them was, in my opinion, pretty intellectual! Or at the very least, held a real message and featured some excellent performances from the cast.

Yet when I said the title I could imagine my friend writing it off as a chick flick.

Was the title a mistake on the creators’ part? Or is it my (our) fault for holding such silly connotations with perfectly normal words? Or, is it our attitude to so-called chick-flicks? When did it become embarrassing for a film to fall into that category? When they became mass-produced?

As I sit here I realise that I have no real answer to this question! Haha. But I hope I’ve intrigued anybody who’s still reading to at least give the film a go! Honestly, I love it.

And feel free to let me know your opinions on titles in the comments!

 

Catriona

"Good things come to those who wait"..... Hmmm

We’ve all heard the saying. Maybe from our Grandparents, who always have a cute wee meaningless moto to apply to every tough situation, or from our parents who want us to learn the art of patience.

I understand the idea behind it. If you hold on, aren’t impatient and continue to work hard and be a decent person, eventually the prize you’re after will be yours. Well, most of the time. It’s a saying designed to raise hope and spirits. To encourage perseverance and defeat doubt.

However, I cannot say I agree, on the whole, with this particular saying. As I said above, the truth is really that good things come to those who work hard, or at least do something other than the implied strategy of simply waiting.

I’m sure some of the people in the world perceived to be the luckiest had to do very little to obtain their good things, but most had to do lots. I think that, too often, we believe that things will be handed to us on a plate in exchange for patience and recently I’ve realised that, if everyone did nothing but wait, there would be no good things for anyone.

I’m not condoning rushing into every opportunity and demanding a positive result, hard work AND patience are required. In fact, patience is essential because, as another popular saying goes, “nothing happens overnight”.

But to only wait, and therefore fail to put effort into things seems to me to be greedy and undeserving. Surely we deserve what we earn!? Don’t get me wrong, I am the worst for waiting for things to come to me, instead of making an effort to aid their occurrence. But I guess that’s why I talk about these kind of subjects on this blog, to inspire myself as much as anyone reading.

So that guy/girl you like who hasn’t asked you out yet? Go ahead and strike up a conversation! That ability to play piano you begrudge your friend? Have a go practicing yourself! That part-time job you think you would be really good at? Hand in a C.V.!

“I’ll see what happens” is so easy to say, but the answer is nothing if you truly believe that “Good things come to those who wait”. Wait, sure. But that comes after. First, you’ve got to DO.

Raisin

 Yes, I have been absent for a month and a half. No, there's no excuse.

I return with more of a typical blog post, where I talk about an event in my life instead off just asking lots of questions and theorising about things..... Don't worry, more of that soon.

Over 3 weeks ago now (wow!) was probably my favourite weekend of University so far. I spent the Friday night and Saturday in Edinburgh at the Scottish Universities Folk Festival (SUFF) with my buddies from the Folk&Trad Society and stayed over at a school friend's flats which was a nice catch-up, but the element I especially want to talk about is a little St. Andrews University tradition: Raisin Weekend.

I'm not sure if I ever actually announced it on my blog, but the university I decided to study at is University of St. Andrews. I've been here for over 9 weeks and I love it. We all have good and bad days, but overall I definitely so far feel that I made the best possible decision for me.



My Academic Dad, siblings and I!

One rather unique thing about SAU is vast number of strange traditions, dating back many many years. One of the most exciting of these, especially for freshers, is Raisin Weekend.

In St. Andrews, we have academic families. During the first few weeks, first years are 'adopted' by 3rd years, until you have an academic mum, dad and often many brothers and sisters. On Raisin Sunday, you go to your academic mum's house in the morning for  'tea party' and games and then to your dad's in the evening for another party. And then on Raisin
 Monday you report to your mum's to be dressed up in whatever weird and wonderful costume she decides, and then to your dad's to receive your 'raisin receipt', which is most often an awkward-to-carry objects which you and your siblings transport to the Quad, where all the first years have the world's largest shaving foam fight! It's kinda mad but loads of fun!


Scavenger hunt with my sisters!

I'll admit, Raisin was something I was really quite nervous about, because, while it Amy sound all nice nicey, a fair amount of alcohol and drinking games is involved. I must clarify, it IS NOT a stipulation to drink, and you can still have loads of fun without drinking, but playing drinking games and getting a bit tipsy has become a large part of the tradition. Some academic parents can be more adventurous and mean than others, and of course you only hear the worst stories (mostly only rumours!)




Scavenger hunt fun with the fam (and some strangers haha)

But my raisin was soooo much fun. I was woken by my mum's with a tequila shot at 08:45- and I won't go on and on and list lots of drinks (and can I just confirm that I was very sensible about not getting really drunk or making myself ill!) but it's fair to say that my morning welcome set up pretty much what the day would be like! My mum's were very inventive, getting us to play drinking versions of popular children's party games: musical statues, pass the parcel, Jenga and many more! I found myself wheeling a shopping trolley around my accommodation block, playing water balloon cricket on the grass and running around town on a scavenger hunt, carrying out tasks such as the chariots of fire routine on the beach and imitating a lizard- all while attached to 3 of my siblings by string! I then proceeded to my dad's to play Weetabix dodgeball and eat lots of pizza!
All in all, it was a really funny exciting day and I urge anyone who chooses to study St. Andrews to really get themselves involved with the traditions because its something you'll remember for your whole academic career and beyond.


The raisin Monday foam fight was really very random! Myself and my siblings were dressed as Harry Potter, butt then of course we arrived at different our dad's houses, so we all met our other set of siblings and carried our raisin receipts to the quad (mine was a rather large flag!)  where there were lots of official people and police- I hadn't relished how organised and formal the foam fight was! So basically we all had this slightly hangover foam fight where we lost all our siblings and friends are were suddenly surrounded by strangers! Eventually I found some of playmates and friends and, when it was all over, we headed back, freezing cold, to get showered- there was nothing to do but to walk straight into the shower, fully clothed! The looks we got from tourists and passers by as we trudged home were hilarious!




My 2 academic mum's and all the Harry Potter's!!



Covered in foam!



All in different costumes with our raisin receipt!

I think Raisin is something which is, and should be, fun. Stay safe, give everything (within reason) a go and just enjoy. I had an essay due on the Monday so made sure I handed it in there Friday before which was the best decision ever because you just want to be able to relax and have a great time. As I said, Raisin is a memory forever and a definite selling point of St. A's haha!





To the quad we go!!

But even if you go to a different unit or just in life in general, I hope you take from this an idea of some of the strange traditions at SAU and an open mind towards trying new things and letting your hair down (I promise, I'm the worst for being negative, and the socialising of things like Raisin can seem haunting, but uni is about meeting new people and what better chance?!)

Catriona xxx



I'm just gonna 'do' me

Before I begin, I'd like to quickly clear something up! When I use the term 'do' here, I AM NOT MAKING ANY KIND OF SEXUAL REFERENCE! If you continue reading, that will soon be clear haha.

So, I can't quite believe I've been away at University for just about 3 weeks now! The time has absolutely flown by! I'm stuck right into lectures and tutorials now, and my work load is very heavy! But I'm sure I'll get used to it all soon enough, I can already feel certain routines building their way into my life!

Right before I left home for the adventure we all know as 'fresher's week', I made myself a promise: I'm just gonna 'do' me.

You know how when we impersonate someone or something, people often say you 'do' them really well? Well too often I find it easier to adopt the persona of someone (not a real person, just a mash up of the qualities I admire) instead of going into things as 100% me, and I reckon I'm not alone in that.

It's not a case of lying to people, I don't make up stuff about myself. But maybe I act in a slightly different way, or withhold details about my life or interests that I don't think people will share/approve of.

However, since arriving at uni I've done my very best to be a version of me that is as true to me as I possibly can be, while still allowing myself to try new experiences and things that aren't usually 'me', but may become so now that the opportunity is there. I hope I'm making sense!

For example, I go out and go to pubs/clubs when I want, I study when and in the way I want, I drink when I want, I eat what I want , I watch what I want on TV, and, most importantly, when topics like these and others come up in discussion with the friends and peers I've met since arriving here, I answer honestly, whether it be telling them what time I went to bed, or how much I studied for a class. I'm not claiming I have achieved this state of 'doing' me every minute of every day, but that has been my goal and I believe I have improved at it, particularly since the impression I have given of myself now, is the one which will last for the next four or more years.

The main point I want to get across is that too often we (well, me anyway!) worry extensively about how other people will think of us, and then end up caught in a sort of false situation that we feel pressured to fulfil all the time. When you 'do' yourself from the start, then you meet people who are truly similar to you when it comes to the different aspects of your life and personality. I have a friend who I hang out with when I'm not drinking because most likely she isn't either, I have a friend who sits every Sunday and watches Downtown Abbey with me, and one who is happy to go with me to the library when I want to get a book. I have a friend who's is usually up for going to the pub or club with me, and one who goes to church on a Sunday morning, just like me. And these 'friends' are not always the same person because, like me, all my friends have different elements and sides to their personalities that are more prominent at different times. But if I was to  'do' someone else, I may not find the people who are best at being my friends and, almost certainly, I would be far less happy here than I am.

By all means, I would encourage everyone to try, once in a while 'doing' someone or something a little different or even the complete opposite to the you you know, but please, I urge you to do so only to find qualities which you think could become a part of you, and not to hide away from just being yourself.

Many actors and actresses (one example I can think of is the very lovely Carrie Hope Fletcher) say that they find it far easier to go on stage as a character than to go on as themselves (for example at an awards ceremony or other event), because they have a persona and pre-written story behind which to hide. They're right. But they still do it, don't they? And so can we, it just takes a little bit of courage.

Book Review: 'The Opposite of Lonliness' by Marina Keegan

THIS IS A MUST READ FOR EVERY SINGLE PERSON. I could stop there and have made the most important point, but that wouldn't be a very interesting review so here we go...
Months ago, I saw Emma Watson (as I'm sure I've mentioned before, one of my leading idols and girl-crushes haha) post on her Facebook page about how good this book was, so I took a screenshot and didn't think that much about it. Then, recently, I went into Waterstones because I wanted to treat myself, and I showed the picture to the member of staff, who found the book for me.

I hadn't read up on what it was, or what it was about at all. So starting it was a nice surprise. It turned out to be a collection of short stories and non-fiction essays, so I read it in bits over a longer period of time. I don't make a habit of reading non-fiction work that often, with the exception of the odd biography and texts for my studies, so it was a real change.

The book's introduction is written by an ex- professor of Keegan when she studied at Yale University. I don't think there's any real or convincing way for me to convey to you how emotional and thought provoking the book became from that moment forward. Keegan graduated from Yale University, and died in a car crash just 5 days later. Her teachers, friends and family worked to create the book 'The Opposite of Loneliness' which is all the more hard-hitting considering the tragedy: she was a true talent taken far far too young.

The book begins with the essay which shares the title of the collection itself, and the concept is so relatable. I have often dwelt upon that amazing feeling of being a part of something, of feeling like you belong to something, but have never known quite what to call it. 'The Opposite of Loneliness' fits perfectly.

The book continues with some short fiction stories, and then some more essays. Each piece evokes thoughts and emotions which I felt I could mostly understand, partly from my own experience and partly due to her vivid description. Each dealt with an issue associated with being a young student, or reflected upon a political idea or opinion, a source of inspiration I too appreciate.

Perhaps I was just feeling emotional while I read it, or perhaps it was the fact that, for me, unit and all these experiences lay just around the corner, but I really felt like I connected with Keegan's words: an intelligent girl in love with writing and academia, trying be the best version of her, balance a work/social life balance, afford uni, and avoid the groping arms of stress and depression. Towards the end of the book, I even found out that Keegan had, at some point in her University life, studied International Relations (my degree, for those who don't know). It's incredibly cheesy and cliché, but it felt in that moment like the book was written for me- and I reckon it would feel that way to all those who read it!

Despite the sad circumstances in which it came about, 'The Opposite of Loneliness' had the opposite effect on me, it made me feel less lonely, it inspired me to keep writing as much as possible and use my ideas, to work hard and to live life to the absolute fullest because so often its just not long enough, to strive to be a positive influence on others and take risks and enjoy being young. It made me excited for unit and for all the opportunities that lie ahead. It quickly became my favourite read of all time.

Please, if you read just one book this year, make it this one. I highly doubt you'll regret it.

Film Review 'Blended'

This was one of those many films which I saw the cinema trailer for, and kept trying to arrange to go and see but I was always either busy, or my friends were busy or whatever, until it was no longer in the cinema or in the forefront of my head! Recently, my family were away on holiday and I had an evening to myself and nothing particular I wanted to watch so I went into the DVD rental store and saw this.


I always enjoy a good Adam Sandler comedy. I just think he's hilarious! I also love the movie '50 First Dates' which sees him star alongside Drew Barrymore, as is the case in 'Blended'.


Brief Summary: Barrymore's character is a single mum. She works as a wardrobe organiser and has no real love life to speak of. Sandler is a single father with three daughters whose wife died when they were very young. When they meet on a blind date it does not go well. However, when Barrymore's business partner and Sandler's boss (another couple) cancel their holiday with the kids in a family resort called 'blended' (a resort designed specifically for bonding time between members of non-traditional families) Sandler and Barrymore are each offered a room. What they're unaware of, is the fact that the other will be there.


The story is funny. Unbelievable, but funny. While it does end up as a romance (which I'm a sucker for!), the real charm of this film lies in the extra storylines: the teenage daughter without a mother longing to be treated like an adult and be noticed by the cute guy at their dinner table, the little kid restricted by his mother's overprotective attitude, the daughter who thinks she can talk to her invisible 'mum', the dad who think he's a dad but is never around, the funny dancing guy at the holiday resort who seems to appear out of nowhere, the list goes on...!


A very funny duo, and  a film I found myself not wanting to end! Made me kind of sad coz I watched it on the first night that my family was away and I couldn't see them for 10 days! But otherwise, a great watch!

Film Reviews: 'The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel' & 'The Second Best Exotic Marigold Hotel'

I bought the first of these films on DVD from a car boot sale a while back, but never got round to watching it. Then, at the end of July, I had a close friend of mine from England up to stay for the weekend (it was a really awesome weekend- so maybe I should do a post just about what we got up to?) and we decided to watch the first one, and rent and watch the second one too! I then reached the first one a couple of weeks later with another friend who had just returned from the part of India in which the film was shot!

The best word to describe these films is heart-warming. The first follows the stories of several elderly people who have made the decision to uproot their lives and check into a hotel in India which is a 'retirement community' (but id really a financially unstable crumbling business run by a young man, played by Dev Patel, with a big heart and a big dream, who's simultaneously coping with the pressures of a controlling mother who won't allow him to marry the girl of his dreams).


Throughout the first film you see each resident develop as a person, watch them discover who they really are and make peace with the fact that they have a limited number of months left in this world. The cast, which included Maggie Smith, Judi Dench, Penelope Wilton, Celia Imray, Bill Night, Tom Wilkinson and Ronald Pickup, were sensational and the plot inspiring.


The second film carries their stories on, as competition from another buyer casts doubt on the future of the Exotic Marigold Hotel Franchise dream. These stresses test the lead characters devotion to each other, and their collective goal and reminds us all that life is worth living, and that we should make the most of every single day (I don't care if some of you view that as cliché haha!)


All-in-all, a fantastic duo of films and I definitely recommend them. They would make for a really nice family movie night too, as their inspirational messages and comedic value hold something for everyone!

Book Review: 'Did I mention I love you?' by Estelle Maskame

I bought this book for my kindle because I had seen it among other popular Young Adult books in the bookshops and then came across it mentioned in a Facebook group I'm a part of, saying that it was a book which originated as a self-published novel on Wattpad and had inspired many girls my age to pursue dreams of writing. I finished it about a month ago but I've been really bad at blogging recently!


Brief Summary: Eden agrees to spend the whole summer at her dad's new house, finally meeting her stepmum and 3 step brothers. While at home she was battling issue of breakdown in friendships and a lack of positive self body image, at her dads she finds herself hanging out with teens who party every other night. Eden must learn to deal with all of this, on top of discovering that being the new girl automatically makes her attractive to boys, including her eldest stepbrother!


I didn't think the standard of writing in this book was particularly sophisticated, however it was perfectly well written.


Parts of the story were very relatable and realistic, such as groups of guys and girls hanging out and getting ready for parties and getting drunk!


But, without giving too much away, the sudden romance between Eden and her step brother was quite unrealistic, considering how deeply she hated him and how much of a jerk he was!


It also bothered me a little bit that Maskame hinted that Eden was obsessively exercising and perhaps even skipping meals, but never sort of came to any real conclusion on whether she was struggling with her body image or anything, which I felt gave the wrong impression about how 'normal' girls react to being made to feel overweight, and how they should be acting. I may have read far too much into it but, that's the problem, it wasn't really made clear- in fairness I didn't realise that this book was the start of a trilogy when I was reading it.


I was also a little disappointed in the ending- it was fine, but a wee bit of a let down!


That said, DIMILY was a great summer read, and had an appeal to it that made me want to keep reading and never put down my kindle! Perhaps for a slightly younger audience? Actually maybe not the issues of drugs and parties and sex are more repayable to my age group I think! Although, increasingly from 15/16 upwards....


The second book of the trilogy is to be released at the end of this month and I think I will read it, but I won't be rushing to run out and buy it on the day its released, so I guess that gives you an impression of how I enjoyed it overall, but it won't make it in my top reads of all time!


Catriona Xx

Book Review: 'Paper Towns' by John Green

Ok, so once again I've been absent from my blog for far too long!! Just getting round to getting on with it really, but definitely hoping to use it more in the next few weeks- missing regular writing!

I read this book at the start of summer, about a 5 or 6 weeks ago! So I apologise for my lack of detail! I decided to order it from my library when I heard that the film was being released on August 17th (3 days ago!), but it was in high demand so I didn't have a long loan of it, causing me to purchase it on my kindle when I wasn't done in time! I considered just reordering it but I was at a very gripping point and just wanted to find out what happened! Actually, the whole novel was gripping and addictive!



I liked how well the lead characters were developed. The relationship between leading male Quentin and his friends Ben and Radar is very realistic, particularly in terms of their chat about girls and prom and cars.... In fact, the whole final weeks of school setting was very relatable to me and helped the book to appeal to me especially, as I mentioned in my last post: 'A Lot of Lasts'



The leading female character of Margo is largely not in the novel, as she mysteriously disappears, leaving the story to follow Quentin's search for her. Overall, I found Margo a fairly unrealistic character- imagine every drama and extreme in one person and you're almost there! HOWEVER, that said, I found many of the individual traits of Margo very realistic: her confidence, her rebellion, her loneliness despite popularity, her emotion and anger, her desire for a fresh start and many many more.


As usual, I read far more deeply into the characters than perhaps everyone would, because it helped me to relate better, and I therefore suspected that John Green had intended Margo to suffer from some sort of depression, but put on this brave, independent front in an attempt at masking it. That's one of the many great things about Green's characters; everyone can interpret something different from them.


Overall, this was a fantastic book, and I am so happy that I read it when I did, because it meant I could relate to it on so many different levels! It will be very interesting to see Cara Delevingne and Nat Wolff's portrayals of the lead characters when I go to see the film on Wednesday. I'm very excited so watch this space! (cheesy I know, but I've always wanted to day that)


Catriona x

A Lot of Lasts

I'm currently reading John Green's 'Paper Towns' in which the main characters are in their last few weeks of High School, and are bonding over experiences such as 'Finals', Graduation and Prom. There's a certain sentence which I just read this evening which got me thinking back to my recent experience in this area and inspired me to write about it:

"It is so hard to leave- until you leave. And then it is the easiest goddamned thing in the world."

I wasn't as emotional as I expected to be on leaving school. I think this was partly because by the end of sixth year I felt very much ready for a new challenge and adventure, to meet new people and to gain a little independence. But that's not to say that I wasn't sad. Sometimes, among my many 'lasts' I took a step back from being a part of the chatter and laughter and just thought 'I've spent 6 years with these people in this place ad goodness knows when or if I'll see them again. We will never all be in the same room again. Where will we all be in another 6 years time?'

I think the many lasts possibly helped me to detach myself a little. I mean, nothing was really the last thing! There was the last of each of my lessons, and then the last day. Then each exam was a last, especially the last one! Then I was back in for all kinds of rehearsals and to help with inductions. Then there was prom, and then the last school concert and then the last prize-giving.

To bring it back to the quote from the very talented Mr. John Green (which I think could be used in many leaving situations, but I'm gonna stick with leaving school just now!) the overall idea of never going back to my school days and routine is a little overwhelming, but now that it is behind me, I'm coping as though it never existed! I mean ok, its technically the school holidays so I guess the real test will be when I haven't had to attend school for a term, or a year! But my last day of classes was over 12 weeks ago and I'm quite into my current routine of working full-time and chilling with friends! To put that time into proportion, its just 7 weeks until I move to Uni!

And my school lasts are not alone in marking the end of a chapter in my life; my last night with my brownies and rangers units, my last music lesson, last family holiday (at least for a wee while), last district orchestra concert..... and the list could probably go on.

I think what I can summarise from my rambling here haha, is that, while school is undoubtedly something which plays a huge part in our lives and from which I have received so much support and opportunities to develop skills I will take with me into the 'real' world, it is just one thing in which we will experience lasts, yes, but also firsts. So many new adventures lie ahead and so, in the end, its the physical and mental act of leaving school that seems at the time to be the biggest drama in the world, but once you've left, the memories remain but it really doesn't feel like such a big ordeal after all!

Book Review: 'Wishing for Someday Soon' by Tiffany King

I actually finished this book over 3 weeks ago, so I doubt I'll have an awful lot to say about it! But nevertheless, I wanted to make a few comments, if only because I can't believe I haven't blogged for a month!!! I do apologise, I've been really busy with work and music, and when I wasn't I was either very tired or lacking motivation.

I was given 'Wishing for Someday Soon' as a birthday present from a friend whose book recommendations I almost always enjoy. It took me a wee while to get round to reading it, but not long to read once I started.

It was quite a good book which follows the story of Katelyn and her younger brother Kevin, who's mum moves them about from one town to the next in accordance with the ending of her numerous disastrous relationships, who fuels her own addictions over buying necessities such as food and clothes for her children, and who abuses her children horrifically, verbally, emotionally and physically.

Due to this train of themes, it is a pretty difficult book to read emotionally, because it reminded me that there are kids whose lives are like that, who have nothing and are ,made to feel worthless and at fault for their own hardships.

The story unravels as a local boy begins to take an interest in Katelyn, who finds it increasingly difficult to carry out her usual routine of hiding her circumstances, especially as her new town is very small.

The book is both realistic and non-realistic. Realistic in the sense that it draws attention to very real issues, but non-realistic in its love story capacity. As sweet as it sounds, the whirlwind romance was a little unbelievable!

Overall, I enjoyed this novel but feel that it was a bit young for me, not necessarily the theme but in the writing style. I'd pitch it at a 13-16 age groups :)

Book Review: 'Eleanor & Park' by Rainbow Rowell

I finished this novel in a sort of marathon read after my music exam on Monday when I came out and all I wanted to do was snuggle down with a cup of tea and a good book. I had treated myself to a copy from Waterstones a few months ago but hadn't got round to reading it.

'Eleanor &  Park' is one of those super popular books that every girl who reads has read at some point in the last year or so, or probably will read over the next few months. It doesn't claim not to be a love story, because that's exactly what it is. But, as a hopeless romantic, I just loved it.

Honestly, I like most books I read. I very rarely finish a book which I didn't enjoy even a little bit. And I'm always willing to try reading anything. After, 'To Kill a Mocking Bird', I wanted to read something quite light and girly. I wouldn't say that 'Eleanor & Park' was light on the sense that it dealt with some pretty deep and moving issues, however it was what I would consider a lighter read in terms of difficulty.

Brief Summary: Eleanor has recently moved back in wit her mum, horrid stepdad and younger siblings. Her step dad domestically abuses her mum and has the whole family controlled and living in fear in a tiny house and without enough money to properly live. Park is from a fairly well-off family. Due to being smart, a comic-book geek and half Korean he is a bit of an outsider at school, but sill has friends and a pretty good life. His dad thinks he needs to man-up so they don't get on that well. When Eleanor and Park find themselves sat together on the school bus, a relationship of passion, necessity and affection begins.

The first 2/3 of the book are quite realistic and, for that reason, hard hitting. The conditions of Eleanor's ;life and the pressures of Park's are something I will never understand fully, but feel as though Rainbow Rowell captured them exceptionally well. The escalating romance is believable because its not nothing and then all at once, but more of a gradual bit-by-bit development. Instantly, as a reader, you want them to get together, they both deserve each other so much.

The last third is a little unrealistic. Without giving away too much, Park begins to make sacrifices and decisions for Eleanor which in real life just wouldn't happen- because his parents would step in and sort it out instead of allowing it!! However, if you can get over that, which I did, it is still very well written. Rowell makes you want a happy ending so badly, but doesn't exactly give it you. But the ending leaves you hopeful, that's all I'll say!

The way in which Rowell captured both characters' vulnerability (as well as the personalities of other secondary characters!) is incredible and truly makes 'Eleanor & Park' a great and unique read which I didn't want to end! I will definitely read more of he work in the future! If you haven't read it, go and do so. I promise it won't disappoint!

Going Solo

If I'm being totally honest, I'm not really sure where this post is going to go, but it's based upon an idea I've wanted to turn into a blog post for a wee while, so I'm just going to keep typing and see what happens....

On Monday, I had a violin exam. It was (only) Grade 6. I put only in brackets not because grade 6 is an achievement that should necessarily be looked down upon or thought of as an 'only' kind of grade, but because really for the time I've been playing I should be further ahead than Grade 6. But I'm not, so I might as well not worry about that too much.

I'm just going to make this very plain: I really do not enjoy music exams. In fact, I don't enjoy anything which requires me to play my violin solo.

Basically, I'm not confident in my playing and that is for one main reason: I don't practice enough. But also, violin does not come naturally to me and isn't something I can just do with ease- it takes a hell of a lot of work which I do try and carry out but yeah, my practice throughout the year hasn't been sufficient.

The other reason I hate exams, and auditions, is because I get overwhelmingly nervous. Even when I try and be confident and calm, the nerves usually take over. When I'm that nervous, I falter and stumble and, in most cases, my head goes blank and I can't remember the almost 50 scales and arpeggios I was supposed to remember....

I think I'm actually going to keep this post reasonably brief because Monday's experience is still fairly raw and it suffices to state that IT DID NOT GO WELL. If I pass, I may die from shock.

But the main point in this post was to determine why going solo is so hard for me. I guess I love to play in orchestras because I can hide behind everyone else. If I can't play a part, I just mime and hardly anyone notices. I try and learn it but I'm not as good as everyone else so I just do my best to keep up! But I enjoy the feeling of being in bands and orchestras, I'm even going on tour this week in Germany with my orchestra!!! Bu as soon  as the conductor threatens to make us play a passage solo, my heart is in my throat and I panic. I just panic.

My music teacher has been great, trying every possible method to help me control my nerves, but to be honest I think it's something to tackle on my own. After an exam and an audition a few years back, both of which had me leave in floods of tears but still pass, it would have been so easy to give up and never do an exam again because what's the point, if it makes me that stressed and worked up?!

But I'm not a quitter and I had really wanted to leave school with a music grade which reflected as close as possible my ability and potential. That's now looking unlikely, which is what has got me down, but I've just got to pout it behind me now.

If anyone reading this is a performer of any sort and has any advice for me or wants to share their stories with me I'd love to hear in the comments. Perhaps from now on I will stick to my groups and bands and orchestras but I don't want these experiences to ever hold me back in life, I want to have to self-confidence to, if necessary, go solo.

Catriona xx

Book Review: 'To Kill a Mocking Bird' by Harper Lee

First of all, I just want to apologise for my lengthy absence from blog-world! First it was the stress of getting my exams finished, then starting a new job, and then practicing for my music exam and orchestra tour! So yeah, I've pretty much been non-stop busy! But, as I'm away on tour tomorrow, I'm hoping to get a few posts scheduled this morning to go up over the next few days, to catch you up on everything!

So I've always known that this novel is a classic, but since I've never studied it in school I've never been made to read to read it. In February, our school theatre club ran a trip to see a theatre adaptation of 'To Kill a Mocking Bird'. I had wanted to read the book in advance of attending, but was reading something else and didn't have the time. The play was fantastic.

My younger sister did study it at school, so when she was done with it she lent me her copy. It took me a wee while to get into, because the beginning was kind of setting the scene with background stuff. I think it helped that I'd seen the play and knew that there was a far more exciting plot to come.

Harper Lee's style of writing is one I really admire, but can also follow. I immediately grew attached to the character's and particularly the narrating character, Scout.

Lee addresses various political and social issues in 'To Kill a Mocking Bird', which I believe is the reason for its immense popularity for the last 50 years since it's publication. There are the obvious ones of racism and the law, of social austerity and poverty and tight-knit gossipy communities. But there are also issues surrounding family and parenting and education and gender stereotyping and sexism and social exclusion and mental health and so much more, if you're willing to dig deep enough. Yet in no way does it feel like Lee is trying to put across a lecture, the story itself is captivating and engaging.

What I like about Lee's style is that she cleverly gets across her messages subtly, without being too forceful or overly descriptive. This is my preferred method of writing too- seemingly simple writing which you have to work to get the true message behind, or which you can choose to enjoy on a number of different levels. NOT that I can or probably will ever be able to write like Harper Lee!

Overall a great story about justice and lack of, growing up and forming your own views and personality. 100% a classic worth reading. Apparently, Harper Lee has her second novel coming out in July (50 years later!!) so maybe I will read and review that too! Also, if you get the opportunity to see the stage version, take it. It's wonderful.

Film Review: 'Pitch Perfect 2'

When, just over a week ago, a friend of mine suggested that we book tickets to go and see this film on the day it was released (also the same day as our Advanced Higher English exam) as a post-exam treat, I jumped at the offer! I had loved the first one, although I didn't actually see it in the cinema, but on DVD later.

Pitch Perfect 2 did not disappoint, and I was particularly pleased to see that almost all of the original cast members returned for the sequel, including Anna Kendrick (Becca) and Skylar Astin (Becca's boyfriend Jesse) as well as many of the 'Bellas' including Brittany Snow (Chloe, and, as I only just realised, Snow plays Amber in 'Hairspray'!) and, most notably, Rebel Wilson (Fat Amy).

The storyline was similar to the first film, in the sense that it followed the high-school A capella group as they had an early disastrous performance, lost their true 'sound' and had to find themselves in order to recreate the group, to then go on be deservedly victorious in a major competition. You may think that to use the same plot skeleton would be boring, but this WAS NOT the case. The trick actually allowed the film to stay true to what was loved about the first film, but had a few spin-off storylines to keep the audience interested. For example, Becca's new internship which keeps her kind of busy, a fierce German group whose all about the competition, the prospect of graduating and having to find what they want to do with their lives after Barton University and, of particular interest, the admission of a new Bella, Emily, who is also referred to as 'Legacy' because her Mother was a Barton Bella too.

The character of freshman  Emily is played by the stunning actress Hailee Steinfeld, who I recognised but don't believe I have seen her anything before. It is incredible to see that she already has a fantastic career at just 18 years old and her character, an overly enthusiastic but very talented singer-songwriter kept the film interesting... and provided a little bit of Romance for Benji (Ben Platt) who you have to love!

I would comment that there were a couple of moments when I felt that the humour of the film verged on racism, but I think I may have been reading a little too far into it, because it certainly wasn't pitched (no pun intended) in a vicious way or anything. In fact, Ben Platt can be quoted as describing, in interview, the humour as "...at nobody's expense".

All in all, I definitely think that Pitch Perfect 2 is as much if not more so of a feel-good film as the first one, with a definite air of friendship, inclusion of every type of person and a sense of being on the brink of life and opportunities.

As I said the two friends I was seeing it with when it finished, I feel as though they ended it in a way whereby they could theoretically make a third one at some point, but with a different cast (probably with Emily at the centre of it as opposed to Becca) but they wouldn't need to in order to conclude it. Personally, although this is probably just e being my cynical self, I'd be a bit wary of making a third film. While number 2 wasn't a disappointment, its wasn't THE Pitch Perfect, and I don't think even the best team could capture the essence of the film for a third time.

I say, GO AND SEE IT! It's funny, loving and the perfect break from thinking about study and exams!!

Writers' Block

So, during the time I've been regularly blogging (which tomorrow will be exactly 1 and 1/3 years!) I have mentioned on a couple of occasions that one of my reasons for blogging less often, aside from being generally busy, has been lack of motivation or inspiration.

Thankfully, I've fallen in love with my blog again each time this has happened, but, throughout this school year, I've experienced a similar issue in terms of my creative writing folio.

I have always enjoyed writing fiction, but it is one thing to talk about enjoying it and another thing to keep it up. Sometimes, my style of writing comes across as childish or simplistic because it is, but other times it is because that is simply my style, and a lot more thought and craft has gone into it when you dig a little deeper.

As I'm getting the final pieces together for my Advanced Higher English folio, to be submitted at the end of this week, I worry that my writing this year has not exceeded or even met the standard of the writing I produced last year and the year before. I had an idea for a story which I feel I could have developed further but have struggled to do so, both due to lack of motivation to devote the time to doing it, and lack of inspiration on how to develop my writing.

I think it's what people call 'Writers' Block', but in its broadest sense. There is a difference between days when I just can't get the ideas to flow onto the paper and screen, and longer periods of time, such as several months, when I'm just not achieving my full capability.

Hopefully, the work I submit will adequately reflect my ability, although I know it will  not be my best work. As the prospect of finishing exams and school being completely over draws nearer, my love for writing returns and I hope to get cracking and write far more over this summer.

Does anyone else experience or have thoughts on writers' block? Is it all in our heads? Let me know in the comments!

Catriona xx

Book Review: 'All I Know Now' by Carrie Hope Fletcher

I've mentioned Carrie a few times on this blog, because she is a Youtuber who not only got me into watching Youtube, but also continues to inspire me to be me and to write. Along with the rest of her following, The 'Hopefuls', I've been looking forward to the publication of her first book since she announced it in May 2014. It is a non-fiction book which acts as an advice-bible, predominately for teenage girls but has something within it for everyone- no matter your gender or age.

I pre-ordered a Hardback copy for half price (£6.49 I think) from Waterstones. My dad wasn't able to pick it up on the day of publication and I was ridiculously disappointed haha. But he picked it up the next day. It's taken me a week to read, but only because I've HAD to break away to study for exams. Otherwise, a night or two would have done it!

The book is spit up into sections and set out like a play or show, with acts etc. (because Carrie is also a West End actress!). Each section covers a different area of life- love, friendship/relationships, self-confidence, stress, mental health and many more sub-topics are all given their own place in its pages.

What I loved about 'All I know Now' is that Carrie does not claim to be a professional councillor or doctor or to know all the answers, she's fully aware that what she writes is only her advice. But after going through the ups and downs of being a teen, she's found herself at a very content point in her life and chosen to share her advice for reaching that place with an audience who already view her as their 'Honorary Big Sister'.

The style of her writing is very informal and lade back. She writes almost as though she was making another of her popular vlogs. 'All I know Now' actually began as a blog and her tone and structure remind me quite a bit of my own blogging style: writing for myself but also for others.

It is clear that Carrie made the decision to be very honest in this book, as she shares a handful of her own experiences in an attempt to remind us all that we are not the only ones who suffer anxiety, embarrassment, heartbreak etc. However, in no way is she too open, there is nothing shocking or deep in there!

I think its fair to say that some parts of the book are a little bit cliché, or the kind of advice we hear time and time again, but not a lot of it. And those parts that are work perfectly well alongside Carrie's fresh ideas and takes on different situations. It's like, you may have heard similar advice before, but when it's all there in front of you, in one place and backed up with real stories and examples, it forces you to think differently.

What I especially admired about Carrie's approach was her metaphors! She comes up with some hilarious ones, and others which you almost struggle to follow. But each and every one of them is very accurate, and its a gift to be able to relate real feelings to something else and effectively describe it.

A lot of what Carrie had to say struck a very real chord with me, because I have, at times, struggled with channelling the best person I can be as being the person I am. I don't know if that made sense? But basically being a good person with positive relationships, self-confidence and the motivation to chase my dreams (cheesy I know!) is something that I do find difficult at times, as I'm sure is the case for most people. I know that life isn't easy, especially when your still trying to work out what kind of a person you want to be and I think that's why I'm allowing Carrie, who I admire a lot, to give me the advice. I think it's almost easier to accept it from someone you don't know and hopefully reading 'All I know Now' will be the light switch I needed to make necessary changes to continue on the happy path. One day I hope to thank Carrie for that help.

Ok, enough with the deep! Haha. 'All I Know Now' is a great read for any age- there were elements I thought both my sister and mum could take from it too. If you're just looking for a wee push to find your feet or even just fancy a wee giggle at what life throws at us then pick up your beautiful copy (wow I didn't even fangirl over how gorgeous a design of book it is, with illustrations from Carrie herself!) today!

Catriona xx

Film Review: 'Cinderella'

So I just wanted to start this post by thanking everyone for the amazing support  I received on my last post, 'I am a Feminist... (I think!)' It was amazing to watch the view count slowly creep up! I know it

was a bit more of a serious tone than my usual but your response has given me the confidence to start thinking up more posts where I give my opinions on issues...

However, for just now I thought I'd break off from exam revision to review a film I went to see with a friend on Friday night. I had wanted to go and see it for ages, but so far had been unable to justify the time out of revision. However, I needed to go into town anyway to shop so my friend and I scheduled a pizza hut and cinema catch-up!

I don't care that I'm 18 years old, I have a special place in my heart for Cinderella and this new rendition did not disappoint.

One of my main reasons for wanting to go was because, from the trailer, I knew that Lily James was playing Cinderella, and I loved her from seeing her in Downton Abbey.  She was a perfect Ella, beautiful and gentle and mesmerising. And I'm not going to lie, Richard Madden as the Prince may have been another motive! Not having seen Game of Thrones, I was unaware of Madden and had not come across him before, but he was perfect in the role and his attractiveness helped a lot! Similarly, Cate Blanchett was the ideal Stepmother... make no mistake, she remained as stunning as always, but her beauty was warped by her wonderfully cruel character. You feel genuinely heart-broken for poor Ella, and that indicates excellent acting both on Blanchett's part, and on James' part, for making you empathise with her. The Step-sisters too were adequately pretty, ditsy and plain air-heads!

The storyline was heart-warming and stuck very true to the original tail. But seeing it in 'real life' as opposed to motion picture was beautiful. Within the first 5-10 minutes I was literally crying (I won't give it away but the sadness at the beginning struck a very emotional chord with both myself and my friend!) and had the kind lady next to me give me a pat and say "U ok Pet?" haha. The plot made you value what you have and literally made me glow inside!

It wasn't a musical version, but there was one song which was sung on a couple of occasions, by Ella's mother and by Ella. I don't know if it was Lily James herself who sang or someone else, but the voices were gorgeous- you could hear a pin drop! The song went: "Lavender blue, dilly dilly, lavender green...." and this in itself contributed to my love for the film as this was a song my mum sang to me when I was little.

The costumes (one beautiful ball gown in particuly!) were absolutely stunning- the costume department did an incredible job!

I would say that, overall, 'Cinderella' is possibly the best Disney Princess re-make I've seen so far (I am now very excited to see Emma Watson star in 'Beauty and the Beast'). No matter your age, go and see it and remember, all you need is "to have courage, to be kind, and a little bit of magic..." <3